1. Imagination vs Reality

    How I wish my conversation with Jason Statham went:

    - Good afternoon, thank you for calling _________, this is _________, how may I assist?

    - May I speak with _________ _________ please?

    - Certainly sir, may I ask who’s calling please?

    - Jason Statham.

    - Two minites Turkish.

    (PA says they are currently indisposed)

    - Five miniutes Turkish.

    - It was two miniutes five minites ago!

    - I know, and I’m sorry, but they will call you back very quickly. You know, before zee Germans get here.

    —-   —-   —-

    How my conversation with Jason Statham actually went:

    - Good afternoon, thank you for calling _________, this is _________, how may I assist?

    - May I speak with _________ _________ please?

    - Certainly sir, may I ask who’s calling please?

    - Jason Statham.

    - (With a slight stutter) Certainly Mr Statham I’ll just transfer you through.

    (PA says they are currently indisposed)

    - My apologies Mr Statham, they are currently unavailable, but their PA has told me they will call you back as soon as possible.

    - Ok thank you, _________.

    (Hang up phone)



  2. Seriously contemplating a murderous rampage this evening.

    Then again, were I to wipe out the entire housekeeping department, my job would not be any easier tomorrow. Probably kind of a career killer too.

  3. And this is what makes it worth it.

  4. Another thing that drives me insane. Please, for the love of god, take note!


  5. One of those days

    Yesterday was one of those days that everyone in this industry is, unfortunately, all too accustomed too: the kind where other departments, members of your extended team, fuck up and let you, and subsequently the guest and everyone else, down.

    There are many reasons why people get into hospitality and tourism. For me, I genuinely like helping people. My fucked up childhood left me with a few unique talents that, depending on the situation, can be a blessing or a curse. Namely, a heightened sense of perfectionism, emotional intelligence and sensitivity in general; which often culminates in the ability to sense what others need without them having to express it.

    I call this both a blessing and a curse, because it is; knowing how to help people before they even know they need help is a double edged sword. It makes you a good friend towards others and, in hospitality at least, it makes you fantastic at your job. But on a personal (and professional) level, a lot of the time it simply means you end up feeling let down by those around you, because they don’t have that same ability.

    Yesterday I came to work and there were two unprocessed amenity drops just sitting open on the computer. As the computer was currently logged into the general concierge account, I also had no idea who had initiated the orders. So I go through all the emails, find the relevant paperwork, file it and send it to the relevant parties so that this shit will get done.

    It was one woman’s father’s 65th birthday and she wanted to make it special for him. She had ordered some Moët and a two-tiered chocolate and fruit plate to be sent to his room for ‘AM delivery’. After speaking with her on the phone twice that morning and finding her genuinely pleasant, I was happy to have been assisting her. After all, helping to make someone’s day is a pretty awesome feeling.

    Around an hour after I’d passed on the order to the appropriate department, I called them to make sure they were making the appropriate preparations. As always with this particular co-worker, I was brushed off with a, ‘yes of course, I got your order. We will deliver it shortly.’

    Another hour goes by and I place another follow up call. This time the response is, ‘my paperwork says to deliver at 3.00pm.’
    To which I respond, ‘no, the order says ‘AM delivery’.
    'Oh yes, I see it now, no worries, I will deliver it now.'

    So here I am, thinking I have got this shit sorted. Come 12.30pm, I get a call from the woman I spoke with earlier, who, by the way, was paying for this gift with her black AMEX - not the kind of person you want to disappoint - who was pretty upset. Apparently her father had received a chocolate plate, completely different from the one she had ordered, and nothing else.

    Furious, it was all I could do to make it through the conversation with her without it devolving into a tirade about how useless this particular co-worker of mine is, as this is not the first time something like this has happened.

    I empathised with her and assured her I would get it delivered as soon as possible.

    After calling Useless back, it was discovered that they hadn’t even read the order I sent them and were going off a completely different order that had been arranged by one of our internal Events staff, i.e. he was blatantly lying at me during the previous two conversations we’d had.

    We got the gifts delivered by 1.30pm, at which time I called the woman and apologised. Not having the authority to offer a discount, I asked for my manager’s approval and promptly called her back.

    I was glad to hear that after being given the gifts FOC she was much happier. She seemed to recognise that the mistake was not mine and, as such, offered some complimentary remarks towards me.

    However, at a time when this place is in its off-season and is literally hemorrhaging money, satisfaction that I did the right thing really wasn’t enough to make my day any better.

    Especially when this particular co-worker of mine has been fucking up ever since I started working with them; will continue to do so until they leave; have almost lost their job because of their many fuck-ups and generally rude demeanor; but have somehow managed to not only keep their job, but receive a promotion, because management took pity on them - because if they lose their job, they get deported. Knowing this, management have decided to put up with their utter incompetence until their visa runs out.

    Which means I will be forced to deal with the ramifications of such complete and utter ineptitude for at least another three months.

    I am just glad that in another week or so I will finally be moving to the desk where I won’t have to deal with them so much… which is another epic tale in its fucking self.

  7. I had one of the best days of my life here. Fuck, I miss Mexico >.<

    (Source: annalysa-aslan, via sunrise-and-love)

  8. Me too :)

    (Source: my-infinite-thoughts)

  9. All of them. I want to go to all the places. If I make it to even a quarter, I will be happy :)

    (Source: cottoncandiesandlollipops)


  10. "Travel opens your mind as few other things do. It is its own form of hypnotism, and I am forever under its spell."
    — (via gleeful14)

    (Source: speedboatsparkplug)

  11. After what seems like I lifetime, I have finally come off Night Audit shifts and come back to the land of the living. I am greatly looking forward to some beach time!

    For those of you who don’t know, the Night Audit shift generally begins around 22.30 and finishes at 7.00. It involves a lot of accounting, as it is our job to reconcile each outlet in the resort and make sure everything balances so that we can roll the system for the next day.

    While the work itself is very interesting and I really loved learning all that I did, the hours made life pretty isolated and I am looking forward to being around people in normal hours of the day again. And yes, looking forward to hanging out at the Staff Bar and going to parties again. One of the worst things about that shift was that when I would wake up to go to work, usually around 19.00-21.30, all I could hear was the music and laughter from parties outside. Then, I would have to walk past all the merry people on my way to work. To put it bluntly, it sucked balls.

    Still, I shouldn’t complain too much, as I did volunteer for the position. Apparently I was the only GSA in history here to volunteer for Night Audit. I did so because I hated working in the concierge call centre and because, in order to get down on the desk (checking people in and out, being in constant contact with people), I was told that I would need to complete Night Audit training.

    So, yesterday, after doing my time and putting up with one of the most misogynistic, condescending coworkers imaginable for six weeks, I finally got my roster for the next two weeks. And where have I been placed? Back in the fucking call centre. I swear to god, the word of management means nothing here. They tell you what you want to hear, then go about their business and do what they were always going to do anyway.

    I have yet to speak to my boss about this, but I will definitely be letting him know how unhappy I am at the next opportunity I get. In order for you to fully understand how frustrating this is, I would have to explain more about how this island works, how I have been treated since I got here and how the people in charge here rarely follow through on what they promise. But that is for another entry.

    (Source: huntingforsunshine)

  12. As beautiful as my island is, I do kind of wish I was somewhere with little grass huts everywhere. Maybe when I get off this rock I will go somewhere more beach-hutty.

    (Source: huntingforsunshine)


  13. 4

    Island life is unique. It isn’t for everyone and as such, there are four kinds of people who take this job:

    1. The party animal: these are the ones who come for island life. They stumble through their shifts hungover, only to make it to the next evening where they can get drunk, hook up and PARTY!

    2. The get in, get out: these are the ones who come for the five star reputation and experience, do their time, and get the hell out before they go insane. Usually they are more professional and less prone to partying than type 1, but if the island gets to them they are likely to crack.

    3. The stuck: these are the ones who have been here so long and have become so comfortable in their little bubble that they don’t know what else to do with their life. While they may not necessarily like it on the island anymore, the real world is too scary and it probably wouldn’t take them back anyway.

    4. The refugee: similar to type three, these are the ones who have nowhere else to go. They have burned all their bridges in the real world and cannot get work anywhere else. While they may have legitimate work experiences, these are often overshadowed by a shady past that prevents them from living or working in the real world.

    The problem with this is, on a five star island, these types clash and it results in poorer results, not only for the guests, but for the resort as a whole. The place I am working at has been running a $10 mil loss for the last five years. This is largely due to upper management being so detached that they see everything as a number and forget about human elements, such as morale. But the clash of the different types is also to blame.

    Type ones don’t tend to do the best job. Type threes tend to hinder any innovation or progressive thinking. Type fours may get the job done well, but they don’t care about the guests’ experience, they just want to get their job done and go home at the end of the day. Which means that type twos, the professionals, end up cleaning up everyone else’s mess and resenting the hell out of the other types.

    This does not, for a harmonious workplace, make.


  14. Intro

    For as long as I can remember, working in the hospitality industry has been my dream. Specifically, working in a resort and one day owning and managing my own has been my dream.

    Having completed my degree in International Tourism Management, graduating in the top tenth percentile of my class, and having worked in the industry in a few various positions, I landed what I thought was to be my dream graduation job; a Guest Service Agent position on a beautiful five star island resort, which is one of the most well-reputed in my country.

    While my ultimate goal has not changed, the reality of this particular ‘dream job’ is quite different to what I had expected. This blog will detail the ins and outs of my island experience and serve as my place to vent and unload after what never fails to be a shitty day at work.

    If any of you have had similar experiences, or would like some advice on the industry, drop me a line. I would love to trade stories.